Ah Beng the Inspector

Ah Beng went for a job interview as a police inspector. The officer asked Ah Beng, "What is 1 & 1?"

Ah Beng replied, "Aiya . . . so simplur . . .eleven lah!"

The officer asked again, "Which two days of the week start with the letter-T?"

Ah Beng replied, "alamak . . . so easy . . .today & tomorrow lor!"

Satisfied with the answers, the officer asked, "Who killed Abraham Lincoln?"

Ah Beng couldn't answer the question, so he replied, "eh . . . don't know leh!"

The officer said, "Well, why don't you work on that & come back when you have the answer?"

Ah Beng left happily & met Ah Lian who was waiting to hear the results of the interview.

"Hoe say liao ! First day on the job . . . I oreddy working on a murder case!"

I Know Kung Fu...

Yes... I know Karate too... and 47 other dangerous words...

So don't mess with me....or else...WAHHHHHH TAHHHHHHH!!!!

Someone to Listen To

People starts talking to me. They pretend they needed advice, but actually they just want someone to listen to them.

- An American Psychologist

Addiction to Winning

"I am addicted to winning. When you are in the red zone, you got to score."

-An unnamed Football Coach

Contract Law

The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, "If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?"

The student replied, "Here's an orange."

The professor was outraged. "No! No! Think like a lawyer!"

The student then replied, "Okay. I'd tell him 'I hereby give & convey to you all & singular, my estate & interests, rights, claim, title, claim & advantages of & in, said orange, together with all its rind, juice, pulp, & seeds, & all rights & advantages with full power to bite, cut, freeze & otherwise eat, the same, or give the same away with & without the pulp, juice, rind & seeds, anything herein before or hereinafter or in any deed, or deeds, instruments of whatever nature or kind whatsoever to the contrary in anywise notwithstanding...'"

Okay...someone please kill him for me. I pay you $20K.

Confidence and Dreams

"Every dream has a beginning."

- Tagline of the movie Goal! (2006)

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"The only one who can tell me I'm not good enough is you. And even then I may not agree with you."

- Munez to his Coach

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If you like rags-to-riches fairy tales, you'll love this movie. Santiago Munez struggles to make his dream come true much to the disappointment of his father. Leaving his life behind, Munez boards a plane & heads to English Football Club Newcastle United. The trials & tribulations that Munez faces as he tries to achieve his dream will test every fiber of his being.

“Goal!” is basically like every other sports film before it, as a young hero does all he can to make it in the big league. Sports films are like romantic comedies we have seen the same thing a million times but that doesn’t mean we don’t enjoy the journey. This is a beautiful film that focuses much on themes like integrity, honesty, discipline, friendship & love.

Challenge the Unknown

Why do people persist in a dissatisfying relationship, unwilling either to work toward solutions or end it & move on? It's because they know changing will lead to the unknown, & most people believe that the unknown will be much more painful than what they're already experiencing.

- Anthony Robbins
Author & Peak Performance Expert