The President: "Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in this history of mankind.
Mankind - that word should have new meaning for all of us today.
We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore.
We will be united in our common interests.
Perhaps its fate that today is the 4th of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom, not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution -- but from annihilation.
We're fighting for our right to live, to exist.
And should we win the day, the 4th of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world declared in one voice:
"We will not go quietly into the night!
We will not vanish without a fight!
We're going to live on!
We're going to survive!"
Today, we celebrate our Independence Day!"From the movie - "Independence Day" (1996)My favourite line is highlighted in red.
A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours. Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name. If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door. - Milton Berle
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the Flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as: Football 5.0, Rugby 4.3 and Cricket 3.0. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. What can I do? Signed,Desperate
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Try entering the command: C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME to download Tears 6.2, which should automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create Snoring Loudly. CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 9.9. This is not a supported application and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7. Good Luck,Tech Support
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and probably have a present for me. As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday.
I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember. The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Karen said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better that someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then, Karen knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!" We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable" "Sure!" I excitedly replied.
She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake - followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday...and...
... and I just sat there, on the couch, NAKED!!!
The miracle of compound interest
I called it the 8th Wonder of the World. This is a concept best illustrated by this classic example. Let's say I give you a cent today, and promise to double the amount every day for a full month. How much money would I be giving you on the 31st day?
The answer: $10.7 million. Don't believe? Check it out: It all adds up
Day 1 $0.01
Day 2 $0.02
Day 3 $0.04
Day 4 $0.08
Day 5 $0.16
Day 6 $0.32
Day 7 $0.64
Day 8 $1.28
Day 9 $2.56
Day 10 $5.12
Day 11 $10.24
Day 12 $20.48
Day 13 $40.96
Day 14 $81.92
Day 15 $163.84
Day 16 $327.68
Day 17 $655.36
Day 18 $1,310.72
Day 19 $2,621.44
Day 20 $5,242.88
Day 21 $10,485.76
Day 22 $20,971.52
Day 23 $41,943.04
Day 24 $83,886.08
Day 25 $167,772.16
Day 26 $335,544.32
Day 27 $671,088.64
Day 28 $1,342,177.28
Day 29 $2,684,354.56
Day 30 $5,368,709.12
Day 31 $10,737,418.24 !!!
Each day, the "interest" I paid you the previous day earns more interest. At the beginning, the amounts are nominal, but by the end we're talking big bucks. Look carefully, and you will realise that it is compounding at an interest rate of 100% per day!
Of course, no one's going to double your money every day. But this concept explains how people who save relatively small amounts over the years can build rather substantial nest eggs. After a few decades, their actual contributions represent only a small part of their burgeoning wealth - it's mostly their returns that are earning returns.
But this also illustrates how debts can quickly balloon out of control. If you're paying interest, rather than incurring it, and you're not diligent about paying off the finance charges in full every month, the unpaid amount will incur additional interest charges, increasing the total amount that you owe. This is why so many families who incur credit card debt eventually find themselves in trouble as the amounts they owe explode past their ability to pay.There are plenty more nifty and helpful money concepts, but these nine are among my favorites. Please feel free to add on to the list as you deem necessary.
Psychologists have discovered that the manner in which people eat Oreo cookies provides great insight into their personalities. Choose which method best describes your favorite method of eating Oreo’s:
1. The whole thing all at once
2. One bite at a time.
3. Slow and methodical nibbles examining the results of each bite afterwards.
4. In little feverous nibbles.
5. Dunked in some liquid (milk, coffee…).
6. Twisted apart, the inside, then the cookie.
7. Twisted apart, the inside, and toss the cookie.
8. Just the cookie, not the inside.
9. I just like to lick them, not eat them.
10. I don’t have a favorite way because I don’t like Oreo cookies.
Your Personality:
1. The whole thing
This means you consume life with abandon, you are fun to be with, exciting, carefree with some hint of recklessness. You are totally irresponsible. No one should trust you with their children.
2. One bite at a time.
You are lucky to be one of the 5.4 billion other people who eat their Oreo’s this very same way. Just like them, you lack imagination, but that’s ok, not to worry, you’re normal.
3. Slow and Methodical.
You follow the rules. You’re very tidy and orderly. You’re very meticulous in every detail with every thing you do to the point of being irritating to others. Stay out of the fast lane if you’re only going to go the speed limit.
4. Feverous Nibbles.
Your boss likes you because you get your work done quickly. You always have a million things to do and never enough time to do them. Mental break downs and suicides run in your family. Valium and Ritalin would do you good.
5. Dunked in beverage.
Every one likes you because you are always up beat. You like to sugar coat unpleasant experiences and rationalize bad situations into good ones. You are in total denial about the shambles you call a life. You have a propensity towards narcotic addiction.
6. Twisted apart, the inside, and then the cookie.
You have a highly curious nature. You take pleasure in breaking things apart to find out how they work, though not always able to put them back together, so you destroy all the evidence of your activities. You deny your involvement when things go wrong. You are a compulsive liar and exhibit deviant, if not criminal, behavior.
7. Twisted apart, the inside, and then toss the cookie.
You are good at business and take risk that pay off. You take what you want and throw the rest away. You are greedy, selfish, mean, and lack feelings for others. You should be ashamed of yourself. But that’s ok, you don’t care, you got yours.
8. Just the cookie, not the inside.
You enjoy pain.
9. I just like to lick them, not eat them.
Seek professional medical help immediately.
10. I don’t have a favorite way, I don’t like Oreo cookies.
You probably come from a rich family, and like to wear nice things, and go to up-scale restaurants. You are particular and fussy about the things you buy, own, and wear. Things have to be just right. You like to be pampered. You are a prima donna. There’s just no pleasing you.
So, which one are you, buddy?
My Dear Wife,
Your presence and countenance is my blessing. Do you know how much I love to look at your face? I enjoy it most when you don't know I'm looking. I love the curve of your cheek, the shape of your chin, the form of your lips. I love the color of your eyes and the way your lashes flutter softly, like butterflies. I love the way your brows lift and your mouth puckers slightly when you are considering something.
I love to touch your face, to feel the smoothness of your skin beneath my hands. I long to run my fingers over your long, silky hair, and I love to run the same fingers over your closed eyelids, down your neck, over your lips, and above your shape nose. I thank God for these little things that bring so much pleasure to our lives. This little but familiar expressions everyday are a source of joy to me constantly. Oh my darling, how I love your face.
Because I Love You,
Your Husband.
The President: 
